Grateful for my life, trials and all…

 

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I have often heard people say “if everyone put their troubles in a pile and could choose from it which you must bear…you would choose the ones you have over those of another.”

I consider myself a grateful person, though I realize now how oblivious I often am to just how blessed my life is. The past year has had me take pause and think about this. Perhaps that is why this truly was the best year of my life….because I realized just how blessed I am.

I have nothing materially to call my own. I don’t have savings, or a house I own or a fancy life. I do have all I need…a warm roof over my head, a family that loves and accepts me, food in my tummy, clothes to wear, I live in a country of peace and plenty. I have had times in my life when I didn’t know where I would lay my head in the near future or how I would find our next meal. Those trials have given me a heart that is aware of those who have greater trials than mine. Those who have no one to turn to for help, no home as a haven from the world and no food to end their hunger pains. I am grateful for those who helped me in life, for family and friends who are there to be a miracle in my time of need. Even when I thought I was…I have never been alone in this world. That made me think of how grateful I am for those who have always been there. How grateful I am that they are still there. I am blessed. It took my trials to make me see I am blessed to have had loved ones who unconditionally love me. For those who are gone but loved me before they passed on, I am grateful for the memories, the love shared and the blessing of having them in my life for even a moment in time. I will take my trial of losing them over never having had them at all.

At times in life I have been separated from the people I love most. I am blessed to have them in my life, to have a child I love so much it hurt physically and mentally to be apart. To be blessed after a long separation with the incredible joy and overwhelming gratitude when we were able to be reunited. I cherish every second with her now. Perhaps I didn’t fully appreciate the joy of every moment together before the pain of every moment apart. I try not to take for granted any time we have together. I think the pain of that trial has helped my heart empathize and offer comfort to the several friends I have who have lost their child on earth. I know my trial was not the same…but I weep with them knowing how horrifically painful it was to be apart when I thought it was forever. No trial I face could compare to their pain. And while I know nothing I do or say can make it better, I start and end each day praying for their heart to be comforted and them to know they are loved. I could never find the words to express how they have blessed my life. I am grateful for the strength they have, the blessing they are to me and the gift their example is to me. I could not have their strength and courage they show each and every day in life. I am sorry for their pain and wish I could take it away, I would give anything to take it away. Their strength inspires others to be more, care more, love more. They make the world a more loving and caring place and for them and their difficult mission they accept and face, I am grateful.

I read a post today by a healthcare worker saying how everyone in healthcare hates their job and the things they have to do…I couldn’t even comprehend that statement. I love my job. I love what I do. I love that I am blessed with the job I have and can actually get paid to help people. How awesome is that? I am grateful to have a job. There are many in the world who don’t. I am grateful to be healthy enough to perform my job. Many can’t. I will take the trials of my career gratefully and wish that was the biggest trial of anyone’s life…to have to go to work and care for people. To spend your day being able to offer comfort, happiness and care to someone most in need. To beable to have the honour of being someone’s hands, feet and mind when theirs fails them. I am blessed to be a caregiver. I wish all caregivers realized how very blessed they are to have such an incredible mission of compassion and love for their life.

I am grateful I am a caregiver and not one in need. A friend who relies on a motorized wheel chair had their chair break down, leaving them without the ability to be mobile at all. I had to apologize to them because as we talked I said “I understand how horribly frustrated and sad you must be right now.” I really don’t understand. I can’t begin to imagine what their trials are like each day. I do know that they face their life with grace, gratitude and strength that makes them one of the heroes in my life. I know that their example makes me grateful every day for the blessing of being able to move my body freely, to walk across the room to pick up something I want, to beable to get in a car and drive to the store when I feel like it and do all the little things in life on my own. Don’t get me wrong…there is no “sympathy” for this individual. They have a beautiful life, they are a beautiful person and have accepted the challenge of their life and inspires many around them. To me living a life that inspires others to love life and others more is the greatest most beautiful life there is. I am grateful for the blessing of every stubbed toe, every time I have to run to the bathroom and make it, every ache and pain and cramp I get. I am alive, I am blessed. I am grateful for every trial I have and every blessing I am given.

They say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger….it makes the world stronger too. I am grateful for those who are stronger than me, who face trials and pain I could not even begin to comprehend much less cope with. I am grateful for their example, their strength and their courage to face their mission on life and inspire the world (and me) to be more grateful, more loving and more compassionate. I am blessed.

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